She notes that there are professional protestors in the country. She knows this because she has a friend who has a friend who’s son gets paid to protest. By the evil liberal establishment of course.

Knowing that such a profession exists (this is all she needs to know this), and that the assault on the Capitol began while people were still up at Trump’s rally to insurrection, she concludes with 100% certainty that the assault was led by professional protestors paid by liberals. After a little prodding from me, she was going to call her friend to ask her to call her friend to see if the professional protestor son of one of these friends was there. I still haven’t heard back.

The logic goes: my mom died in 2009. I know for a fact that there were murderers in the country in 2009. Therefore my mother was murdered.