emotional IQ. Lack of empathy is a human condition and we all suffer this condition. More and more often we simply never bother to put ourselves in the shoes of the other person. We take a stance and never care about the impacted person. Everything is black and white, we refuse to accept grey. You have your position and anyone who disagrees with you is 100 percent wrong. Step back from the conversation and ask yourself how reasonable that assumption is?

This mentality is turning more and more into a mob mentality. Social media makes it worse. Now the media is on the hunt for any flame that exists and they throw fuel on the fire. Before social media, only a few flames existed....now they are everywhere. In the case of Oberlin, you have a culture of coaching and developing mind to have a low emotional IQ.

What is ironic to me is that as empathy seems to be decreasing, whereas sympathy is increasing. It seems like more and more people are willing to give their money and time to causes but fewer people are willing to listen to others. One possible reason for this is that people really care about their cause and are willing to give....possibly even more to spite those who have opposite views. I think certain organizations leverage this divide to generate more donations. It’s really depressing to me.

I think it’s something we are guilty of, some more than others. I have my internal beliefs, but have always tried to put myself in the shoes of the other party. I work harder and harder, trying to do this everyday. Pick a topic that you have a firm stance on and take the opposite position for a few minutes. It may help you better understand why the other party feels the way they do and you may have a more intelligent discussion that doesn’t start with a protest, riot, name calling or loss of respect.