programs / safety nets don't equal "socialism" according to the definition of socialism as a political / economic system in which the people control the means of production, but right or wrong, "socialism" as a term has come to be synonymous with strong social safety nets and welfare programs. Hell, even Bernie refers to himself as a democratic socialist, but as crazy has Bernie is, he generally doesn't advocate for broad nationalization of the means of production.

So how would your friend referring to gov't social safety net / welfare programs as "socialism" also mean he made his lifetime earnings via the socialist structures in America. Surely you see a difference between someone who earns a paycheck from the government in exchange for labor with someone who receives an "unearned" social benefit by virtue of existing.