Your EXACT WORDS ...

The only way out is through. From the beginning, we should have....

...simply gone about our lives as we always have and reached herd immunity -- i.e., essentially the Swedish strategy (or more so like FL here in the U.S.). We could have protected the more vulnerable (e.g., seniors, those with serious co-morbidities) as best we could (or, better said, they could have protected themselves), but otherwise let it runs its course. It's doing that anyway, but now just over a more protracted, painful and expensive timeframe. The COVID-specific results would likely have been similar, but at about $5 trillion+ less in costs (and counting) and far less national acrimony.

Frankly, I don't understand your point -- or at least what you would have done differently. Look around the country and the world -- nothing that anybody has done has made a damn bit of difference, at least with respect to what could have been done here. As the most recent example, Israel, which is the poster-child for COVID protocols and vaccines, is currently considered a no-go zone for Swedish travelers, LOL.

Today, we have masks available, social distancing available, vaccines available and treatment available. Anyone who wants to try to protect themselves can easily do so. If you can't protect yourself with all of that, then you can't protect yourself, period, nor can anyone else. It's a virus -- it's gonna virus. I understand that you are in a concerning situation, given your wife's condition, but I don't know what else to tell you. It is the world we live in now and have always lived in.